Little E: What the F?

The annual Toys R Us toy catalog arrived in the mail today.

This is a monumental day for the Yoys. It is the day that they go page by page, circling toys that they want me to buy them for Chanukah, that I'll probably never ever buy them for Chanukah.

But it takes up a good hour of their time, so I'm all for it.  Even if it means crushing their consumer dreams.

Little E was circling away when he came upon this:


He was reading aloud all of the details of this S'more Maker. All I could hear was "THIS THING WILL MAKE THE BIGGEST MARSHMALLOW MESS EVER AND DO NOT ALLOW IT INTO YOUR HOME."

Little E was struggling with one of the words.

MOM, WHAT DOES THIS SPELL: F-U-C-K-E-R-S.

WHAT??

I shot up from my chair and walked over to him and this pornographic catalog.

FLICKERS. AAAAAAHHHHHHHH, it spells flickers. As in a flame.

I stifled a laugh and handed it back over to Little E.

No chance in hell, my friend.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Take Your Yoy to Work Day (or maybe not)

Image
Mr. Yoy asked if I could bring the boys by for dinner and take a look at his new office with all of his pictures professionally hung. I, of course, obliged as I am always looking for something to kill time before bedtime. WOULD YOU LIKE TO DRIVE INTO THE HEART OF BUCKHEAD IN THE MIDDLE OF RUSH HOUR? or WOULD YOU LIKE TO STAY AT HOME FROM THE HOURS OF 4-7PM WHILE YOUR KIDS SLOWLY DRIVE YOU INSANE? This mom would take traffic any day of the week. So we headed off to Terminus. We made pretty good time, by the way, until we hit Piedmont.  What a cluster! We hit up Mr. Yoy's office first.  It looked fantastic!  Big and Little E seated themselves next to the window and ogled the women at the three hotel pools within view. No wonder Mr. Yoy asked for binoculars for Father's Day.  (That was a joke) We walked over to Ru San's for some sushi dinner.  I give them props for blasting their music.  It makes me much more relaxed as there is something louder than my chi
Read more

Letters to the Superintendent and Cobb County School Board

Image
Hi folks! A quick note from Mrs. Yoy as I know it's been awhile. For those that know me personally, you know that I've been very vocal in unsuccessfully convincing the Cobb County School board to change their COVID policies, which to this day, remain a steaming pile of sh*t. We follow zero health guidelines and figuring out the quarantine policy is akin to solving that math problem from Good Will Hunting. I will be publishing the letters I've sent to the board and Superintendent over the last 18 days of school. I've heard back from my representative, who is lovely, and my pediatric dentist who also serves on the board, but it's been crickets from the voting block of four and the Superintendent, Chris Ragsdale. Apparently, he's too busy pumping iron and self-tanning. Anyway, enjoy. HAPPY FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL! (E-mail sent on August 2, 2021) Good morning from East Cobb! As a long time resident, I am writing you this morning to plead with you to reconsider the mask
Read more

Happy Second Day of School (E-mail sent on August 3, 2021)

Good morning from East Cobb! I am following up on an email I sent yesterday morning, to which I received zero responses.  As a long time resident, I am writing you this morning to plead with you to reconsider the mask policy for Cobb County schools this year. I’ve been speaking with many parents and we are stressed and saddened by the lack of consideration and communication from the board regarding the recent surge of Covid. In case you wanted to know, I can also see the future. And in two weeks when we are all at home, virtual again, with sick kids, teachers, bus drivers and others in quarantine, I will be thinking of you and your total disregard for the health of our children and our families. Look, we all make judgment mistakes. We all have a crazy family member spreading conspiracy theories. But we don’t let these people and/or the internet comments section guide our work decisions. Gosh, I can’t imagine if I let my dad’s view of our income tax system influence how I prepared tax r
Read more